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Family constellation


and how it works

What is Family constellation?

Family Constellation is easy to describe: A straightforward method for restoring the flow of Love and Success in the family system.

The method was created by a German psychotherapist, Bert Hellinger, as a result of his observations of indigenous South African tribes, where he served as a priest.

He noticed that in the tribe, family relationships followed an internal order based on intergenerational interaction and the collective field. The individual behavior, feelings, and attitudes are considered and understood in the context of the larger group, as each person is part of a family and assumes certain roles in the family structure. Hellinger gradually developed the systemic therapy work that reveals how the fates of our previous family members influence those who come later.

Every member of the family, including those who have departed through death, abortion or difficult fate, is energetically present and influences the others around him/her. Likewise, emotions or situations that are not dealt with by people in the family system can be transferred to those who come later in the system (children and grandchildren).

There is a certain family conscience that preserves the balance of the family system.

When the orders of this conscience are ignored, the flow of vital energy and love are being distorted and members in the family, usually the children, are under the pressure of the system to compensate for the imbalance; they would take on symptoms, fears and blockages, adopt certain behaviours or even repeat a destiny that is not their own. In other words, a person may experience difficulties or illness due to distorted balance in the previous generations in the family system. 

Family Constellation has become a reliable intervention when people are “stuck” or when they have pain, anxieties, problems and barriers that seem somehow not to be of their own making. Through Family Constellation method one is able to let go of family entanglements, restore the balance in the system and become free of the problem at hand.

The method

If you would like to use the Family Constellation method in order to look deeper in a current situation in your life (carrier, finances, relationship, health, etc.), the first step is to define your topic. Then the facilitator would interview you about important facts regarding the family system and the topic at hand.  

The client then is invited to choose “representatives” for oneself and for particular family members (usually the mother and the father of the client).

If you are having your constellation live in a group, you would select representatives from the people the group. If you are having an individual session the facilitator would invite to use small papers with the names of the representatives.

The facilitator would invite the client to place the representatives in the space as per client’s feeling / intuition. And then the investigative work begins. The job of the facilitator is to sense the condition of the representatives and to guide them towards restoring the order, the balance and the flow of Love in the family system.

The Family Constellation method has its own language, phrases and simple movement rituals that impact deeply.

During the constellation representatives are asked to say certain phrases and to do certain movements so that healing can take place. The benefit of doing so is immediately felt by the representatives and the client who is observing the process – usually a great deal of unburdening is felt, negative emotions and tension is dissolved, the representatives feel at peace.

In the case of individual session the facilitator would ask the client to say the appropriate phrases.

Throughout the constellation, the facilitator supports the movements, the representatives and the client to reveal what is necessary to witness to encourage not just a paradigm shift, but a new way of living, a new way of experiencing relationships, love and the future.

Why are the constellations useful and for whom?

According to Bert Hellinger, the constellations work on the level of the soul. It goes way beyond the rational mind and any psychological analysis. A constellation is a recreated model of the family and it allows you to find out what events or people from the past, even a few generations back, affect your live and how.

Family system constellations allow you to deal with:
• unconscious mechanisms that motivate your existence
• blockages and beliefs that you have since birth
• “entanglements” out of loyalty you might carry to your ancestors

Many different kinds of issues can be explored with this method:
• Challenges in communication, in life, work, or relationships
• Diseases and emotional or mental disorders
• Professional and organizational (business) issues
• Parental difficulties
• Internal conflicts of the personality

Constellation work is useful for:
• Clarifying and improving relationships in intimate, family and work relationships
• Finding the “right” place in life, gaining strength and ability to act; reconnecting with resources
• Bringing awareness to a current health situation
• Help and support in difficult times such as divorce, separation, loss, death, etc.
• In case of self-doubt or inability to make a decision on a personal or professional level;
• For improving relationships with children and supporting the whole family

Constellations cannot replace either medical or psychiatric treatment, even though they are therapeutic.

The Constellation work brings relaxation, balance and true understanding. It helps to restore the natural order in the family system. This “order” is not from the mind – it comes out of the universal mechanics and principles of life itself. Respecting those unspoken laws is what allows Love and Success to flow freely in the family system.

Naturally, the success of a family constellation depends on the degree of openness of the client, how much he/ she can face, to what degree they can integrate the new level of awareness. A constellation made out of curiosity or a problem that is not really important to the client will be rather superficial and will not have an impact. This can also happen if the client remains emotionally distant and attempts to interpret the constellation in a rational way.
In this sense, family constellations are not a magic pill to achieve amazing results. What can be realized and what the person will integrate is a very personal journey in the process of their growth. Hellinger says that solutions can only be found if they are in harmony with the person’s soul.

IS DOING A CONSTELLATION ENOUGH TO RESOLVE MY PROBLEM?

Constellation can have a lasting and profound impact. For sure you can have a great deal of clarity about the topic you want to explore with the method.

Like all therapeutic methods, however, it is not the answer to everything. Sometimes you need to continue with individual therapy or other therapeutic methods that address other possible aspects of your personality and problem.

Book a free session and see how the Family Constellation can be of help to you.

Book your free SUCCESS STRATEGY session and get started!